Stop body-shaming and start body-loving | Lifestyle

Let's talk body-loving. Over the past year, I've seen a lot of talk about body confidence and body-loving. This is truly great. I think it's about time that we stop criticising people based on their bodies. After all, everybody deserves the right to love the skin their in. Yet, that is not the case. We still see people being judged by their weight. Whether you are a size 4 or a size 24, you should be allowed to feel comfortable in your own skin. I'm a keen advocate for encouraging people to be healthier. But, there's a thin line between promoting healthy living and criticising a person's weight. I believe it's possible to promote health without judging people based on the number on the scales. So why is body-shaming still happening?

Everyone deserves to feel body confident. You should be able to embrace the way your body looks and be confident in your appearance. But please don't do it by shaming other people's bodies. Boosting the self-esteem of one body type by criticising another is not positive. Body-shaming is never okay, whether it's towards someone who is overweight or underweight.

This morning a tweet was RTed onto my timeline with the trending hashtag #healthynotskinny. Honestly, I was outraged. It made me so angry to see a whole hashtag dedicated to stating that 'skinny' isn't healthy. Then, later today I heard about how on Loose Women (a talk show that I find is often small-minded and offensive) Jamelia made a comment about how stores shouldn't stock plus size clothes. She then tried to justify this by saying they shouldn't sell clothes 'above or below a certain size'. Yet again, she later tried to justify this comment by saying that she was talking about extremes, as in 'above a size 20 and below a size 6'. Oh when will she realise, she's just digging herself a deeper hole. Her words are clear evidence of body-shaming. Surely, she cannot believe that anybody who doesn't fall into her idea of the 'correct size' shouldn't be allowed to shop in store. As though, they should be outcasted from society because they look (or don't look) a certain way. This is not okay and such views need to eradicated. But sadly, that probably won't happen. No matter what we do, body-shaming is still going to exist to some extent.

As someone who is naturally skinny, I've grown up being judged, bullied, ridiculed and shamed for my body. At the age of 7, a Doctor questioned whether I was anorexic (I wasn't) because of my low-weight. This carried on into high school, where other teenagers would call me 'anorexic' and make derogatory comments about how skinny I was saying how I'm 'skin and bone', I look like a 'skeleton', a 'twig', I'm so thin they could 'snap' me. The list goes on and each comment is just as hurtful. I know that I shouldn't let such comments affect me. But, they do hurt. As a result of such remarks, I'm conscious of my body. I've been made to feel that my weight is unnatural and wrong.

Even now, at the age of 22, I can walk down the street and complete strangers will tell me that I should 'eat a burger' or that I need 'fattening up'. People draw attention to my weight in a negative manner; in a way that would be unacceptable if I was on the other end of the scale. Honestly, even as I'm typing this now the word 'skinny' is making me shudder. I've grown to see that word in a negative light. But I shouldn't see it that way. It is just a word. I shouldn't let a word define me.
 Back to Jamelia's comment about clothes sizing. I'm a UK size 4...a size that Jamelia said should not be sold in stores. In actual fact, it's hard to find stores that do stock size 4 clothing and as a result, I struggle to find clothes that fit. This makes me feel even more conscious of my body. I hate telling people my clothes size because I can't bear to hear the shocked responses I get in return. I once tried searching online for UK stores that stock size 4 clothing to instead be faced with numerous forums stating that 'no normal, healthy women in a size 4'. I only know of 4 stores that sell size 4 clothing. Almost, as if it's taboo to sell clothes that are smaller than a UK size 6. I did a similar search for size 30 clothes and I was faced with pages of 'plus-size' clothing stores, which is amazing. However, I couldn't help but feel that if the popular high-street stores happily sold plus-size clothing, there wouldn't be a need for so many 'specialised' plus-size online stores. People shouldn't be pushed to shop online because they struggle to find clothes in their size on the high-street.

Women who all weigh 70kg, but all look different! Proof that you shouldn't let your size define you. Source: Pinterest

Nobody should feel ashamed to state the sizing label that is stitched into their clothes, nor should they feel that size defines them. You shouldn't care whether a person is a size 4 or a size 24. It's their body and they should be allowed to feel happy about it. You wouldn't like it if somebody judged your body, so please don't think it's acceptable to pass comment on how another person looks. Your words can be hurtful. Body-shaming can be seriously damaging to a person's psychological well-being.

These days, I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that I will always have a small frame and chances are, I'll probably always be classed as 'underweight'. I can also bet that I will still be faced with nasty comments about my appearance. But, I'm trying to look past that and I'm trying to love the skin I'm in. The only person who I'm letting judge my appearance is me. I don't focus on the number on the scales, and neither should you. Instead, we should be focused on being healthy. I know what my body needs to stay alive and I'm learning to love my body. Though after years of bullying and criticism based on my appearance, my journey to body confidence will be a long one. So next time, before you pass judgement on how another person looks. Stop and think how you would feel if the tables were turned. We should celebrate all body types, not just one. After all, we are all different shapes and sizes.

Let's empower one another rather than bringing each other down. I believe that everyone deserves to feel beautiful and confident about themselves. Let's stop the body-shaming and start body-loving. Allow others to love themselves.

ps. Here is a Anti-Bodyshaming corgi to encourage body-loving. Source:Tumblr.